"I haven't heard anything specific, but the Godfather thinks that it's something big. He's pulling a Karnac and put his guesses in sealed envelopes to see if he was right about what the topics were."
I folded my arms and leaned back in my chair. The Godfather had an uncanny knack for knowing what horrible and evil things were being handed down from our Corporate Masters. If he thought something big was coming, then odds were good it was going to actually be something, indeed, big. And big in the world of television never equated to anything good.
"Tex Dillweed is leaving, though, that much I do know," Irish said. "There's a memo down on the girls' desk. Not ours, of course." Irish and I shared a desk, and the girls, two other directors, shared another.
"Good. He's an idiot. At least one good thing today." Dillweed was in charge of the graphics and promotion departments, a gigantic idiot, useless in every respect, and one of those people who only speak to you when they want something. He was like fingernails on a blackboard to me, to such an extent that the other directors would frequently do whatever work he brought them for me instead of having me interact with him. I think they were afraid I might take a swing at him, which was an unreasonable assumption on their parts. Not impossible, however.
"Okay," I said. "Let's brainstorm. What could the meeting be about?"
"Corporate is coming," Irish said, "so I imagine it's something big, or at least big to them. Could be about the stock." The company had recently been removed from the NASDAQ for long-term poor performance. "Anything that hits them in the wallet is always a big deal to them."
"If the company was trading at fifty dollars a share, I'd still be making what I am now, so if that's all it is, I could care less."
"I've also heard the Emperor is leaving." The Emperor, our General Manager. His last child had just gone off to college, and so theoretically there wasn't anything holding him to the station or the city any longer. "Or could be an anchor shift. Broom Hilda could be going to mornings." He laughed at the absurdity of this statement. Hilda was roughly a thousand years old, far past the shelf-life of female local television anchors, but she held fast to her 6pm and 11pm anchor position like a barnacle on the hull of a ship. She must have had compromising photos of someone in power having sex with children, animals or both.
"They could be canceling my show," I said. I'd been directing a horrible afternoon magazine show for two years, something the company came up with to replace expensive syndicated programming like Judge Judy or Dr. Phil. They were certain that the show would make them money, and to be fair, it has, since the overhead is next to nothing, and most of the segments are sponsored by local businesses, but the quality... oh, the quality is so, so sad. Public access has better production...