"They hung up," I said to the Muse, and put the receiver back into the cradle.
"Who was it?" she asked.
"They didn't say."
She returned to her knitting. "It was probably Houdini, calling from beyond the grave."
I sat back beside her and picked up her yarn ball to idly play with. "What makes you say that?"
"He called earlier, but didn't want to leave a message."
"So you're saying I've got a spirit phone all of a sudden?"
"Yep," she said, her knitting needles a blur of motion. "Verizon called earlier, said some kind of mumbo-jumbo to me, wouldn't stop talking. I don't know what they said, really, but I told 'em to go ahead and upgrade whatever they wanted to just to shut them up."
"At least Houdini was polite when he called," she said. "That fucking Dillinger can go screw himself. I don't care how big his dick is, he's a son of a bitch on the phone. Houdini at least was a gentleman."
"You're creeping me out, Muse."
"Hey, buddy, you aren't the one who had to chat with Ted Bundy. Talk about creepy!" She paused in her knitting and considered a moment. "Kind of charming, though. Very flirty. Too bad he's dead, he's just my type."
"Now you're really creeping me out."
She shrugged. "It's a living."
The phone rang suddenly, and I jumped.
"Get that, would you?" the Muse asked.
"Not for a million bucks, baby."
She snorted and dropped her knitting, jumped up and ran for the phone. She got it before the answering machine picked up. "Hello? Yes. Oh, just a minute, I'll check." She held the phone down and put her palm over it. "Someone named Miss Borden. She wants to know if you're available."
"Cut it out, Muse."
"Hmm. She said something like that too, actually." She giggled. "She sounds sort of cute, dude. You should axe her out."
I got up off the couch and headed for the door. "Okay, I'm leaving. You call Verizon and get my phone switched back, or I'm going to have to bring that midget from Poltergeist here to kick your ass."
"Yeah, she can have my ass when Bundy is done with it. He's dreeeeeeeeamy!"
She harumphed as I slammed the door shut behind me.